Noah Orona still had not cried. SURVIVING SANDY HOOK: 'I can't give you proof except for my trauma' Ashley survived the 2012 shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School that left 26 people d. No person should ever endure what you have endured, even once, another wrote. This time was about rage, as one March for Our Lives staffer put it, but thats not what Fuentes and Touray were feeling. But eerie similarities between that massacre and the Dec. 14, 2012, attack at Sandy Hook Elementary School have left multiple survivors in Connecticut with renewed anger, grief, and an . Americans are afraid to go to school, the movies, the mall, concerts, work, church, parking lots. It was nice of him to say, Touray thought, but she didnt really agree. Teacher Abbey Clements was in her classroom at the time of the shooting. I dont think the same thing is necessarily going to work, Fuentes said afterward, sitting on a stone bench outside Murphys office as Touray listened. Newtown Action Alliance/YouTube, @indigogloves/Twitter. "I thought I was never going to see my family again," she says. Just moved here, imagine that. By clicking Accept All Cookies, you agree to the storing of cookies on your device to enhance site navigation, analyze site usage, and assist in our marketing efforts. "It's just so painfully common in this country," she says. Kaitlin Roig-DeBellis had just sat her first-graders down for a morning meeting at Sandy Hook Elementary . But at the same time, it felt almost impossible for that to actually happen. '", "It was very traumatic for me, because there was no comfort whatsoever," she said. Its just a cowinkidence. 2. It can generally be healthy and meaningful to speak out about your experiences. If you dont know what to look for, it can be easy to miss the signs, or dismiss them as unimportant. Student Geneva Cunningham was in fourth grade at the time of the shooting. How difficult the aftermath is, and the decisions it entails, hasnt been easily understood. Days later, her jacket was found along the banks of the Mohawk River. For Nicole, that means anxiety. All five survivors shared the horror they felt when they learned a gunman killed 21 people at Robb Elementary School in Uvalde last month. Discovery Company. "The mom told me - and I thought this was very insightful - that she was suffering from what she felt was survivor's guilt because so many of her friends no longer have their children but she has hers," Solomon said. (Adam Wolffbrandt/ABC News) The experience of . 16-year-old snowboarder lands history-making trick at world championships, Co-workers win $50K lotto jackpot together: 'I'll never forget it', The Divine Nine: The history and impact of Black Greek letter organizations, Digital Deals & Steals celebrating women-owned businesses. But I work two full-time jobs to try to change that. There had to be a way forward, a way to break the political stalemate that left Fuentes sitting on a bench, giving the damaged nerves in her leg a chance to recover. This is gun violence prevention too. In 6 October 2022 Two months ago 36 people died by shooting stabbing and vehicle-remming in this small town. "In May 2018, a gunman walked into my school," Louis said. Courtesy Jane Dougherty. Touray had reconnected with a fellow Oxford survivor and hung out with new friends who had lived through the killings at Sandy Hook Elementary, including Jordan Gomes, a teen whod joined her in the meeting with Blumenthal. At the time, Fuentes thought she was lucky. Arokium, a second grader at the . As Touray readied to go on stage, rehearsing the lines in her mind, Fuentes sat in the distance, beneath the shade of a white oak. 1. By Kaitlin Lewis On 12/7/22 at 11:33 PM EST. Those bonds remain strong today. The next Tate. appreciated. Published Dec 3, 2021. The sun rises over Newtown, Conn., Thursday, Aug. 18, 2022. Jacob said she came to realize the gravity of the situation -- and the immensity of the loss -- later, at a nearby fire station, where parents were looking to account for their children. Sandy Hook survivor speaks out 10 years later, 17-year-old Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting survivor Cyrena Arokium speaks with "CNN This Morning", Children from Ukraine are being used in Russia's pro-war rally, This disease took decades to plummet. In the years that followed, parents and survivors, some of whom are featured in the . Their classmates witnessed these murders. I cant speak for you or what happened at Oxford, he told her, his tone serious. "I couldn't get the sounds out of my head during the night," he told ABC News. Chase YarbroughSanta Fe, Texas 2018Shot six times. I also struggled to learn, make friends, or trust my own sense of reality. Our mission is simple, and our ambitions unbeatable, she had shouted to a roaring crowd, so overcome with nerves that she vomited on stage before finishing her speech. Educators teach peace and nonviolence. On Dec. 14, Jackie Hegarty of Newtown, Connecticut, knows her phone will be "flooded" with messages, as it is each year on that day, the anniversary of the Sandy Hook Elementary School mass shooting. He looked her in the eyes. Survivors and families of those killed in the Sandy Hook shooting say the incident is . Now on the cusp of adulthood, the . Touray and Fuentes had just made it through security at the Hart Senate Office Building, passing inside a metal detector monitored by three armed guards, when a roller on the X-ray machine came loose, slamming against the tile floor. But Murphy urged Fuentes, Touray and the other activists to keep doing what theyd been doing. She is returning this month with other teens to commemorate the 10th anniversary of the Sandy Hook shooting at the Annual National Vigil for All Victims of Gun Violence. One moment in particular -- too graphic for words -- has stuck with Jackie, who was a second grader at the time. The staff was largely left to fend for themselves in those early months, with little or no mental health support. Thousands of people were packed onto the hill behind them leading up to the Washington Monument, and a layer of gray clouds lingered overhead, but the rain had stopped. "I'm struck by how sad it makes me that it keeps happening. She took part in March for Our Lives, a student-led mass demonstration in March 2018 in Washington, D.C., to push for gun control legislation. Many experts who all told us they knew the solution. In the end, beyond family, it was the love of Mrs. Clements, a teacher, that softened my daughters heart and opened her mind. She had 18. 1 min read. As students return to school this fall, Masi shared some tips to help students feel safer this school year. We teach conflict resolution by talking out problems. But we can no longer just provide love and prayers. I need help, Touray told her, tears trickling down the side of her nose. "I think it's really important for, whether it's teachers, staff, parents to really become that trusted adult in a student's life that a student can come to them with their concerns, that they will be heard, they will be listened to. ", "Somehow in that moment, by God's grace, [she] was able to act as she was already deceased.". Theyd hear later that a man in the crowd had shouted something that sounded like gun during a moment of silence for Uvalde, sparking a stampede. Fuentess message was on Tourays mind that night in her hotel room, where she left the bathroom light on because in Michigan she shared a bedroom with her younger sister and was sleeping alone for the first time since she was 4. At least three of her schoolmates have died by suicide since the slaughter that left 17 dead inside Stoneman. She started trembling. In the years that followed, parents and survivors, some of whom are featured in the accounts below, have dedicated their lives to fighting for change. He said the young girl described the shooter to her mom in a way that only a young child can. Describe forgiveness, but dont prescribe forgiveness. My daughter has many years to decide what she wants to. Four months after Sandy Hook, Connecticut passed sweeping state legislation on gun control. Touray chewed on her bottom lip. Nicole Melchionno survived the horrific Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting and doesn't want any other child to have to endure the nightmare she did. EIN: 46-1657101. "Kids shouldn't have to worry when they go to school," says Nicole, now 17 and a gun violence prevention advocate who spoke to PEOPLE ahead of the 10th anniversary of the Dec. 14, 2012 shooting. Teacher with Mother's Gun, Police Say: Could Mom Face Charges. "I couldn't close my eyes without reliving it.". I try not to be jaded, said Fuentes, who still had shrapnel embedded in her leg and behind her right eye. Then, after Oxford, Touray was invited to talk about what shed been through at a state event. Samantha Fuentes, an 18-year-old senior at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School who was shot in both legs and face, spoke at the March for Our Lives rally. The joy of her conquering her greatest fear, is beyond my adult comprehension. Photo editing by Mark Miller and Mark Gail. She stood in the corner, facing the wall, and called her mom. He spoke out against banning girls education. The next morning, her chance to ask it came at the base of the U.S. Capitol steps during a meeting with Rep. Ayanna Pressley, a Democratic congresswoman from Massachusetts. A staffer guided her to a bench beneath the 51-foot-tall black steel sculpture in the atrium of the Hart Senate Office Building, where Hogg was finishing up a photo shoot for an upcoming magazine profile. Quotes from the interviews were used throughout the 360 work. Design by Irfan Uraizee. Everything about these gatherings left her conflicted. On December 14, 2012 a 20 year old 120 pound autistic kid with assburgers syndrome strolled into Sandy Hook elementary school strapped and loaded with over forty pounds of weaponry and murdered 26 people in less than eleven minutes and killed a ratio of 26:1 at a 96 murder percentage rate, only . "I think for teachers, they are that first line of defense in the school, they really know their students," Masi said. "Nothing's ever as simple as we see but there are things to do," Masi said. Watch their stories. There was no gun, but word had come too late for the survivors from Parkland and Sandy Hook and Oxford gathered behind the stage. She felt the same about seeing old friends from other gun safety organizations. A woman walks a child toward the Sandy Hook Elementary School on December 15, 2012 in Newtown, Connecticut. "You can't expect a kid to sit in a classroom and focus and pay attention when they're concerned about their safety," Masi added. Shed heard of Parkland, but knew almost nothing about it. Sign up for PEOPLE's free True Crime newsletter for breaking crime news, ongoing trial coverage and details of intriguing unsolved cases. Nevertheless, individually and collectively, survivors keep trying. Thousands of other students have the same story. In 2018, survivors of the rampage at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High in Parkland, Fla., had organized a demonstration that drew tens of thousands of protesters to D.C. One teen after another took to the stage in front of the U.S. Capitol to demand that lawmakers finally pass gun restrictions to protect children from being slaughtered in their schools. Now, at the hotel, Fuentes headed off to change into her blue March for Our Lives T-shirt, her black folder of talking points still unopened, and Touray found a quiet space on the other side of the room where she could study all of them, hoping to come up with a question that would somehow make a difference. Thats somehow part of why Im here. She used to, until she taught herself to brace for the triggers before they came. 1 of 3. He would have turned 18 that day. CLICK HERE for full coverage of the tragedy at the elementary school. Touray rejoined Fuentes, who put her hand on Tourays shoulder. Subscribe to our newsletter to get updates on gun violence prevention. Sandy Hook Shooting Essay. On May 24, a gunman killed 19 students and two teachers at . My heart goes out to all the families and the friends of the Michigan State shooting, she continued. Want to keep up with the latest crime coverage? We've received your submission. "You hear about other shootings and it breaks you. The girl, a 6-year-old whose name is not being released for privacy reasons, was the first student to emerge from the lockdown at Sandy Hook, Solomon said. This year, Hegarty said many of the messages she . Experiencing the trauma of one school shooting is one too many. But this year, as students return back to school, the nonprofit's leaders said it was important to open up a conversation about how school shootings impact the lives of survivors. , the local newspaper, in a front-page editorial on the five-year anniversary pointed out that, What we have learned is that not all good intentions came across as they were meant. It was an upsetting characterization of a community that has turned political points of view, hearts, schedules and philanthropic priorities inside out to support whomever needed it in the aftermath. A gunman entered the building and fatally shot 20 children and six adults before taking his own life. Two Connecticut State Police officers escort a class of students and two adults out of Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Conn., Dec. 14, 2012, after a shooter entered the building and killed 20 children and six adults before taking his own life. Out of respect for their privacy, ABC News is not using the survivors' last names. 'Choose Love' to Stop Violence, Sandy Hook Mom Says on Eve of Shooting's 7th Anniversary, Sandy Hook Dad Responds to Texas School Shooting: 'Sadly, I Know the Unspeakable Pain'. Im not. It is the deadliest mass murder by a single perpetrators in the history of Thailand. Like others who lived through the unspeakable horrors of that day, she remains scarred from the trauma she endured. Nicole Melchionno. Dec. 14, 2018, marks six years since the shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut, where 20 children between the ages of 6 and 7, as well as six adult staff members, were killed. "It makes me angry, because it doesn't have to keep happening," Jacob, the Sandy Hook library clerk, told ABC News. NEWTOWN, Conn. Gun violence destroys people, families, neighborhoods, communities, schools, districts, towns, friendships, marriages, livelihoods and so much more. Slowly the mind grasps that the dead can never be brought back, yet you cant stop that mind from churning out ways you could make it better and its all made worse by a town full of opinions. To Fuentes, being right didnt matter much, not anymore. Weve let down generations of children by letting this continue, one user replied. The other three survivors -- Andrew, Jackie and Nicole -- are now juniors at Newtown High. I can remember walking up to my front door, putting my hand on the doorknob and thinking, Pull yourself together, you are about to see your kids, before I turned the handle. Matthews recalled how she hunkered down under desks when in 6th grade at Sandy Hook with her classmates . Survivors of the 2012 Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting boarded a bus in the parking lot of Newtown High School at 5 a.m. Saturday for the drive down to Washington, D.C., to join in the March . Found an article from Dec 2011, Christy Hatcher is mentioned along with her two daughters, one named Samantha, 5 years old (in 2011). Sitting toward the front of the room, she worried that if the gunman came into her classroom, that she would be one of the first to be shot. "And we still act like we don't know how to solve the problem is maddening. And when she cried and told Abbey she missed Ms. Soto Mrs. Clements simply held her and said, I do too.. Ten years ago, Nicole was only 7 and in second grade when a 20-year-old gunman armed with an AR-15 assault rifle, two semi-automatic handguns and an endless supply of ammunition blasted his way into the cozy school through the plate-glass window next to the locked front door. Howd the interviews go? Fuentes asked Touray, the two of them standing together in a gated VIP section next to the March for Our Lives stage, where Hogg was midway through his speech. Living through a mass shooting changed all four of the students. The Newtown Bee, the local newspaper, in a front-page editorial on the five-year anniversary pointed out that, What we have learned is that not all good intentions came across as they were meant. It was an upsetting characterization of a community that has turned political points of view, hearts, schedules and philanthropic priorities inside out to support whomever needed it in the aftermath. (Video: The Washington Post), Dozens of attendees scattered in fear after a man stormed on stage during a moment of silence at the March for Our Lives protest in Washington, D.C. on June 11. A gunman killed 19 children and two adults at Robb Elementary School in Uvalde, Texas, Tuesday morning. We can no longer allow this to happen. Living through two is utterly incomprehensible. They could hold hands. It was one of the deadliest school shootings in U.S. history. Jackie Hegarty was a second-grader at Sandy Hook Elementary School when an intruder armed with . "This time, I wanted to focus instead on the lived experiences of people, the aftereffects -- because I don't think people focus on what happens after a school shooting and how that impacts lives for decades.". The teens and young adults in the video, it turns out, are survivors of some of the worst school shootings in the nation's history, who have experienced varying degrees of physical . February 28, 2023. Fuentes walked up first, and Gomes went behind her. Can we celebrate not only Zoe, he told the crowd, but all of the idealistic young people who are going to lead this movement so we win?. Gradually the mind kicks back in and then decisions and realities came one after another. December 14, 2015, 5:00 AM. Thank you so much for all your work, she said. One of the most iconic photographs captured in the aftermath of the deadly shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School is being misused in Facebook memes about misogyny and . Standing in front of her, Pressley thought for a moment. After murdering his mother at their home, Adam Lanza fatally shot 20 children and 6 adults at Sandy Hook Elementary School before taking his own life. Now Im a volunteer leader with Moms Demand Action for Gun Safety fighting to chip away at our deplorable statistics. The Taliban silenced him. Alexander DworetParkland, Florida 2018Survived being shot in the head. Nothing about this has been easy. What Touray didnt say: Theyd escaped through a window and ran. Nicole with Chloe, a survivor of the Uvalde shooting. Jones and his company Free Speech Systems have been found liable for $1.5 billion in two defamation trials over lies that Jones . "And the fact that we saw what happened at Sandy Hook, and we saw how many children died, and how affected the survivors were, and how the ripple effects of gun violence affect so many people," she said. So, attend every funeral for every child, but attend to your own child who was with her fourth-grade class that day. The mission of Sandy Hook Promise is to educate and empower youth and adults to prevent violence in schools, homes, and communities. As a child, she rarely paid attention to the news and was only allowed to watch PBS Kids on weekdays. I want to be able to swim not in a sea of grief, she continued, before asking Congress to pass the new laws that March for Our Lives staffers had helped her work into the speech. Mary Ann Jacob was working in the library as the shooting unfolded. The following narratives, written by survivors of the Sandy Hook shooting and excerpted from the book If I Dont Make It, I Love You (Skyhorse, 2019), provide intimate accounts of the transformative nature of trauma in the aftermath of a school shooting. I suffer from PTSD, depression, anxiety, insomnia. She didnt see any exits. And for that, there are no words to truly describe the gratitude in my heart. You need to.. 17-year-old Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting survivor Cyrena Arokium speaks with "CNN This Morning" ten years after the shooting that left 20 first-graders and six adults dead. "There were neighbors telling us all the updates -- that a class had been found in a closet, that other people were still in the firehouse," she remembered of the aftermath 10 years ago. Touray buried her head in her hands, until at last she looked up. For Fuentes, the aftershock from the 2018 mass shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida, is something she still lives with each day. "I'm so grateful for all of those that survived and have the strength and fortitude to be able to share their stories, to help save the lives of someone else," Hockley added. People who are at risk of hurting themselves or others often show warning signs before an act of violence takes place. His older brother Nick was killed. 1 / 7. 311,000 students have seen gun violence at school since Columbine. In previous years, Sandy Hook Promise released PSAs teaching people about gun violence prevention and how school shootings are preventable. They were all so smart and determined. The school district floated the idea of bringing in substitute teachers if we were not up to returning, but not one staff member thought the kids should return to a school full of strangers. I wont talk too much. Best friend killed beside her. Solomon said the girl's family was suffering survivor's guilt because many of their friends were not as lucky and had lost children in the tragedy. "I know our generation has not been complacent with this issue. Fuentes had spent the day exchanging hugs and jokes and silly memories with friends from Parkland she hadnt seen in months. She refuses to let it move on. Catalog this book for the school library, but not that one. In the PSA, Eastmond honors Nick by holding up his photo. Its okay, Vickie Brent-Touray told her. Theres training for a wild animal in the school, for high wind, for an active shooter. I continue to teach at another school in Newtown, trying to build a generation of empathetic problem solvers. But this year, she has decided she wants to be a teacher at Sandy Hook School. Browning, a March for Our Lives policy associate, skimmed through the pages of the packet, detailing all the items they wanted Touray and the others to pitch to lawmakers: universal background checks for gun purchasers, the Protecting Our Kids Act, an assault weapons ban. "I have issues with mobility and getting around. Americans are afraid to go to school, the movies, the mall, concerts, work, church, parking lots. Within seconds, terror had swept from one to the next, and now each of them had returned to the worst day of their lives. This was her first trip away from home without an adult. U.S. Mass shootings Gun reform Sandy Hook Gun Violence. Nine years ago, Walczak was at school when one of his classmates opened fire at him and three of his friends. Speaking from a room across the road from where Anthony Dwayne McRae gunned down several MSU students just hours before, Matthews said she still suffers from a full-blown PTSD fracture in her lower back from the hours spent crouching in her classroom. Fuentes has been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, panic disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder. The lone survivor of one of the two Sandy Hook Elementary School first-grade classrooms where Adam Lanza allegedly shot and killed 20 children tricked the gunman by playing dead, the girl's pastor . President Barack Obama pauses during a speech at an interfaith vigil for the victims of the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting, at Newtown High School in Newtown, Conn., Dec 16, 2012. On Sunday night's episode of American Idol, Santa Fe High School shooting survivor Trey Louis auditioned with "Stone" by Whiskey Myers. Just in terms of, like, helping, what else do you think that we could do other than what were already doing? Touray asked, holding a pink notebook that on some pages had her new gun violence notes this time HAS to be different the #1 cause of death in children is guns and on others had food ideas for her upcoming graduate party banana pudding!. Anxiety, panic disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder for themselves in those early months with... Hugs and jokes and silly memories with friends from Parkland she hadnt seen in months school! Moms Demand Action for gun safety fighting to chip away at our deplorable.!, ABC News generation has not been complacent with this issue Robb Elementary school December... Go to school this fall, Masi shared some tips to help students feel safer this school year violence... Because there was no comfort whatsoever, '' she says & quot Louis. The sounds out of my head during the night, '' she says keep trying my... Common in this small town, depression, anxiety, insomnia keep doing theyd! 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